A Pair of Bartletts

And the winner is.....

We have a winner folks!  Melody--you were picked by the random number generator....so congratulations!  You will be receiving a Dave Ramsey book, courtesy of James Woosely!  Thank you again to James for contributing to Bee My Guest this week.  I personally benefited from the information that he had to share and I hope that those reading along did also.  With the state of the economy, it's easy to want to hold on to any extra income that we have, so for me, this was personally challenging to evaluate the financial timeline with Rob.  We are SO appreciative of the great information and challenge from James!  If you would like to contact James directly, you can email him at [email protected] or you can visit him on the web at http://www.WoosleyCoaching.com .  

Congratulations again to Melody!  I will contact you about your prize!  

Well folks, for now, I'm wrapping up "Bee My Guest".  I will probably pick up again with another guest article in December (just one) and then beginning in 2010, I will probably run the series once every other month, so stay tuned!  And again, THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU to everyone who has been reading and participating, either verbally in comments or silently just by reading!  I have THOROUGHLY enjoyed doing this!  Starting tomorrow, I'll be back to my regular blog posts, so please come and visit often!

SAHM – Dream Job or Impossible Dream?

I would like to give a big thanks to James for being obedient to the Lord in writing this article.  I was not totally peaceful with ending "Bee My Guest" at the close of August and at the same time, James was prompted by the Lord that he needed to share this word.  Rob and I are thankful to know James and his wife, Heather.  James has a special calling on his life and is faithful to share with others all that the Lord has taught him.  Thank you so much for coming by today!   As always, please leave an encouraging comment (or in this case, even a question for James) and you will be entered into today's giveaway!  James will be giving away a Dave Ramsey product...so don't miss out!

SAHM – Dream Job or Impossible Dream? by James B. Woosley

A few weeks ago I was having fun asking questions to my 300+ friends on Facebook via my status updates, and asked people what their dream job was and if they were pursuing it.  I would never have imagined the responses I got, mostly from SAHMs.

If you know what a SAHM is, you probably are one or want to be one.  If you don’t, you’re probably a guy struggling to figure out the acronym!  I’m talking about Stay At Home Moms.

Clarification
Now, let me first make clear that I have no problem with women in the workforce or working moms.  Many of my best bosses, co-workers and clients have been (and still are!) women and moms. 

If you are a mom and you choose to work, great.  Don’t feel guilty for taking a career path along with motherhood. 

But if you are a mom who’s working and dreams of being home to raise the kids, this article is for you.

Dream Job
Let’s go back to the Facebook question.  The overwhelming majority of responses I got were from my SAHM friends, who said they had the best job in the world already.  They were living their dream in being able to stay home and raise their children. 

God bless them!  I used to think it would be great to do that as a dad…but now I have kids.  And while I love them dearly, if I had to be a SAHD, my next job would be making license plates!

My SAHM friends have found a wonderful place to be…they love their work.  And it is definitely work!  I see how much my wife Heather does raising our kids and how exhausting each day can be.  Again, I’ll take the corporate rat race over that job almost any day!

But there is a segment of our culture that dreams of being a SAHM.  Unfortunately, too many single and married working moms feel it is an impossible dream.

Single and Married Moms
The single moms bear the burden of providing all things for their children as best she can.  Regrettably most live at or below the poverty level.  But they press on and manage to do a great job in spite of the challenge.  My advice below may not help you quit working altogether, but it could still make life a little better if you’re struggling financially.

Soapbox: Christians have a biblical mandate to help widows and orphans (James 1:27).  In 21st century America, I think we should include these single moms in our tasking...regardless of how they got there.  If you know one (and you do!), find something you can do to help them out.  One simple act of kindness will go a long, long way.

Another segment is married working moms who want to be SAHMs.  Remember, I’m not talking about the working mom who wants to work.  These are moms who work solely for economic reasons.  They simply cannot afford to quit their jobs…or can they?

Transitioning to SAHM Status
Here are some practical, though challenging steps to get yourself to your dream job of exclusively full-time mom (assuming you have the support of your husband…if you don’t, deal with that first by talking it out or getting a good counselor).

1. Evaluate your budget.
   Is what you’re making in income equal to or less than what you’re spending on day care, clothes, food, travel, etc. for work?  Is there nothing in the way of benefits from work that you can’t live without or cover through your husband’s work?  If the answer is yes to both questions, then congratulations.  You can quit your job and come home to be with the kiddos right now!
   
   If the answer is no, then work through the next few steps and strive to establish your household based on one income, even while you continue to have two.
   
   
2. Evaluate your debt.
   What about that car payment?  Yes, throw that in too.  If you’re working simply to pay a car note, you need to recheck your priorities because you may have chosen having a nice car over your kids.  (Ouch.  It hurts when I say it out loud, doesn’t it?) 
   
   Wouldn’t it be better to sell the car and stay home if that’s what you want?  What do you want more?
   
   
3. Build a Plan.
   If financially your family simply cannot make it without your income, is it time to give up on your dream of being a SAHM?  NO!
   
   But it will take more work to get there.

 a.      Beans and Rice! 
Get on a bare-bones budget, aiming to live solely on your husband’s income (remember that once the money comes home, it is household income, not his and hers).  Unless you are already struggling, there is normally a lot more wiggle room in the family budget than you realize.

b.      Debt Freedom! 
Eliminate all debt except for your house (no payments means freedom to live on less).  You may even need to consider moving if your house payment is too much (more than about 25% of your take home pay).  Most people can do this in less than 24 months if they focus.

c.       Schedule It!
Make a timeline for when you want to quit your job and come home.  Six months?  Two years?  Mark it on the calendar and involve the entire family in the process.  The length merely represents the intensity it will take to get there.  And don’t forget to do the math in the budget so that it’s a realistic target.  Focused intensity and sacrifice over a specific period of time will get results.

d.      Show Me the Money!
Find additional income elsewhere.  Maybe there are things your husband can do to find a better paying job (and hopefully one he loves as well!).

There are also a variety of creative work-from-home opportunities available, just make sure that they fit the lifestyle you want as a SAHM and fit your personality (if you like interacting with people, sales may be great, but if you hate numbers, accounting would be a bad fit). 

What you don’t want to do is simply transfer your crazy work life into your home or you haven’t achieved your goal of being a SAHM.  If you have 5, 10 or even 20 hours available per week, find the right fit for that schedule…but don’t cheat and do more hours than you allocate.

e.      Prepare for a Rainy Day!
You’ll need an emergency fund of 3-6 months of expenses, should anything happen to your husband’s job along the way. 

Also, make sure you both have adequate life insurance!  If you lose your spouse and he’s the lone breadwinner, if you don’t have 10 times his income in life insurance, you’ll likely end up as a struggling single working mother overnight.  (Why 10 times?  Because invested, it will replace his income year after year, allowing you to stay home.)

It Can Be Done
It has been my pleasure to witness this transformation several times as a result of teaching Dave Ramsey’s Financial Peace University course (classes are forming all over all the time…click here for more info and sign up for my next class starting Sept 27th at First Baptist North Mobile). 

Sometimes it’s a young couple expecting their first child…sometimes it’s a struggling family with several young kids.  The point is that it’s doable!

Who are You to Write This?
Why do I have a heart for this topic?  Well, a SAHM raised me.  I’m married to one.  And I honestly think it’s best for our kids to have a mom at home, at least while they’re little.  I’m just a bit old fashioned I guess.

At the end of the day, as a father and a husband, I have to ask myself what is best for my family.  So I’m happy to work my tail off at a job to bring home the bacon so that my wife has the option of staying at home.

Final Thoughts…
The keys to making this happen are really the keys to accomplishing any goal in life.  You must first define what you want and what it will take to get there, and then commit to doing (sacrificing!) whatever it takes to make it happen (discipline!).

No one is willing to sacrifice for something they don’t believe in.  No one likes discipline at the time, but no one looks back on the results and regrets having had it.

What do you believe in?  What are you willing to sacrifice to get there?  Can you wield discipline for a purpose?

About the Author
James Woosley is a Career and Personal Finance Coach who helps people find financial freedom and work they love.  If you would like help mapping out and implementing a strategy to become a SAHM, you can contact him at [email protected] or 251-281-8539, or simply visit http://www.WoosleyCoaching.com.

Bee Here for Your Key to Financial PEACE

Remember when I started this special series, Bee My Guest?  I really thought that the Lord had provided enough guest authors for me to do the series for just the month of August.  Well, guess what?  I just didn't have a peace that it was going to end at the close of August.  The very same week that I was struggling with this and asking the Lord..."so who will it be now?  I'm out of options right now!"--I got an email from a friend of mine and Rob's.  His name is  James Woosley and he is a Career and Personal Finance Coach who also teaches Financial Peace University at our church on a regular basis.   James had been reading the articles for Bee My Guest and the Lord prompted him to contact me about a very special topic that is of special interest to women, especially in these dire economic times.  Friends, I have read the article....and you DON'T want to miss this!   James has SO much knowledge and information about financial planning that I know it could be hard to pick one area to talk about.  But the area that the Lord laid on his heart is very special to him, and you'll see why.  Ladies, if you have EVER had the desire to stay home with your children (or be a housewife who may not even have children) and have not been able to figure out how to make it happen, I PROMISE you that you don't want to miss this!  And, as always, there will be another great GIVEAWAY!  James will be giving away a Dave Ramsey product to our randomly drawn recipient!  And remember, to be eligible for the giveaway, you must leave an encouraging comment for our guest author...and that's it!  You'll be entered for a chance to receive this special gift from James!

I am REALLY pumped about his message....and the reason why is because it DIRECTLY applies to me and to my husband.  So I know that if it's blessed us just by the sneak preview of the article....I know that it's going to bless you or someone that you know.  

So mark your calendar for Tuesday, September 1st!  You don't want to miss this!  I'm even thinking that because of the state of the economy, and because I don't want a SINGLE person to miss out on this article (or on this giveaway), I am going to open the comments for Tuesday, September 1st and for Wednesday, September 2nd.  That means that we will not announce our winner until Thursday, September 3rd.  James will be seeing the comments, so please feel free to post questions too.  I will count questions in the drawing, as well as the general comments.  So PLEASE make your way over here on Tuesday and see what the Lord has in store for us in the area of finances, Stay At Home Mom's (SAHM) and Financial PEACE!

Abundant Blessings to YOU!

May I Have the Envelope Please?

Thank you SO much to everyone who participated in Bee My Guest yesterday!  I hope that all of you enjoyed it as much as I did.  I love to hear sweet stories of how good our God is.  And He is good ALL the time!  Thank you to my sweet friend for sharing the story of the awesome journey that they have been on!  And....as of today(see the comments on the post), the journey is still continuing!  Please keep this precious family in your prayers, even today.  

And....APRIL!  You were chosen in the random drawing!  Woo HOO!  Praise and worship music is headed your way!   April will be getting a copy of my church's newest CD entitled, "God Hears". I hope that you will consider getting a copy of your own!  You can pick up a copy for you and your family by clicking here.  

Now....for a little more unfinished business.  I had originally planned that this series would run in the month of August, and then would probably do it quarterly after that.  Well, guess what?  The Lord opened up a door for another friend of mine and Rob's to do a guest post next week!  So, we're extending Bee My Guest into September!  I'm not going to put my own time line on it since the Lord may decide to continue this even beyond next week!  

You will NOT want to miss out next week!  Do you like to save money?  Have you thought about trying to put a little more back each month?  Are you working outside of the home (like me!) and are ready to stay at home NOW?  Well, if you answered "yes" to any of these questions, then you NEED to be here next week!  So, stay tuned this week....I'll be giving you more information as the week goes by!  

Hope everyone had a great Wednesday!

The Christmas Gift

Well dear readers, it's here AGAIN!  The time flies when we have such great guest authoring going on!  I'm so glad that you decided to come by today because you are just in time!  It's time again for Bee My Guest and another great post from a sweet friend.  And before I go any further, PLEASE don't forget to leave an encouraging comment for my sweet friend and you'll be entered into a random drawing!  This week, I'll be giving away another copy of my church's newest album, "God Hears".  I felt that the album title was so appropriate for the topic this week, since God does hear us and He answers us.  When we delight in HIM, HE gives us the desires of our hearts (Psalm 37:4).  

I'm very glad to have a dear friend here today that's going to be sharing her story of how adoption has touched she and her husband's lives in a mighty way.  For the sake of anonymity, I am not providing too many details about names and places,  but you know what?  God still has a story to share through this sweet family and the names are not important.  What's important here is how "Heaven Came Down" to this sweet family...just like the old hymn says.  So, please sit down and "sit a spell", as Granny Clampett would have said!  We're glad you made it!  And, don't forget to come back tomorrow to see who the blessed recipient will be in our giveaway.  Don't be alarmed if that post is not up until tomorrow evening.  I have a very busy day at work tomorrow, so if I'm not able to get the drawing done before I leave for the office, then I will be taking care of it as soon as I come home.  So stick around!

THE CHRISTMAS GIFT

For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. In love he predestined us to be adopted as his sons through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will— to the praise of his glorious grace, which he has freely given us in the One he loves. Ephesians 1:4-6 (NIV)

 

Child adoption…..what image or thought comes to mind when you hear or see this word? Hopefully, you have a wonderful feeling when you hear this word. For us, my husband and I, the first image or thought is unselfish love. Sadly, most people do not view adoption in this light. They see and hear the extreme, rare horror stories on the news or even a sitcom and feel it must be how all adoptions are. They feel that they cannot love someone that is not biologically their child. Do you love your spouse? Do you love your friends? How about your friend’s kids? If you do, then you can love a child that is not biologically yours. There is no difference. Our family went from a family of two to a family of three a little over three years ago due to the blessing of domestic adoption. Here is our story:

 

We were not “matched” with biological parents before our daughter was born as her biological mother had not picked out a family for her daughter before she was born. She knew that she could not raise this little girl, but really and truly did not know what to do. Her family would not support her in raising this baby. The biological dad was no longer in her life. Thankfully, she spoke her concerns while she was in labor and she was able to meet with a social worker. The social worker owned the agency that we were using to adopt through. Our daughter’s biological mother then looked at profiles and wanted to meet us. We met Kali’s biological mother on Christmas Eve and then brought our daughter home with us that evening. We had a wonderful day shopping on Christmas Eve buying all kinds of baby’s things before we met our daughter. Kali was 7 days old. She was the best Christmas present we ever received.

 

We continue to see Kali’s biological mother twice a year, send her pictures and email frequently. She will always be very special to us. She believes, as we do, that God used her to bless all of us with the birth of Kali. Whereas she carried her for 9 months, we are her parents. There will always be a special bond between Kali and her. We wouldn’t want that any other way. Kali has beautiful pictures of her and her biological mother in her room. We also have an adorable picture of the both of them in our living room from our last visit. We want adoption to be something we can always talk about with Kali. An open adoption is like any other relationship, it grows with time. Ours grows stronger each day. Was it hard in the beginning? Yes, there were times that it was indeed hard, more so because it was all new. If you have a chance at an open adoption, I beg you to give it a try and not give up when it is hard. Your child will know that you worked at this relationship and your relationship with your child will be stronger because of it. We pray often for Kali’s biological mother, and the biological parents we have yet to meet since we are waiting to adopt again. Prayer is very powerful. We would not be blessed with this little girl without it.

 

Feel free to follow our next adoption on our blog and ask questions about adoption www.bigsisterkali.blogspot.com

 

If you live in the state of Alabama, please check out APAC for information about many kinds of adoptions. They can help contact you with adoption lawyers, agencies, and tell you about foster adoption. They have counseling services available, books to borrow, advice and all for free. Here are some more Alabama adoption links.

http://www.abchome.org/

http://www.heartgalleryalabama.com/

http://adoptionrocks.net/

Thank you for reading!

 

But these things I plan won't happen right away. Slowly, steadily, surely, the time approaches when the vision will be fulfilled. If it seems slow, do not despair, for these things will surely come to pass. Just be patient! They will not be overdue a single day! Habakkuk 2:3 (NLT)

Bee My Guest....Again!

I am SO excited that it is already time again for Bee My Guest!   I have a VERY special guest that will be posting tomorrow (Tuesday) on the subject of open adoption.  You will not want to miss this sweet story my friends.  I want to tell you that I was very privileged to see this sweet story unfold before my eyes.  I am so thankful for this dear friend and her husband who have agreed to share their story, as I have been for the other special ladies who have been posting the last few weeks.  Adoption has a very special place in our church as we have MANY families who have participated in this beautiful process.  We have had all sorts of adoptions to take place from international to domestic.  And my....what a beautiful bunch of little ones that have come into our fellowship!  They are all precious in the Lord's sight....and in that of their sweet parents and their fellow church members as well.  Even if adoption is not something that you have personally participated in or will ever participate in, you will not want to miss out on this blessing of a story!

So make sure and grab a cup of coffee and join us on Tuesday for Bee My Guest!  And, as always, there will be another GREAT GIVEAWAY!   Make sure and leave an encouraging comment for my sweet friend and you'll be entered into a random drawing!  The giveaway this week will be another copy of our church's latest praise and worship album, God Hears, with Jason Breland & The North Mobile Worship Choir.  

I hope to see you on Tuesday!  And I pray that you'll have an incredibly blessed week!

Ding Ding Ding---We Have a Winner!

Hey there everyone!  I'm SO SORRY that I'm SO LATE posting the announcement of the recipient of the giveaway from yesterday's post.  But, better late than never!  Well, do you want to know who it is?  Well, I used a random-- number generator and our very blessed recipient is...LIZ....from Be Encouraged! Congratulations Liz!   Liz has got some great music coming her way!  And, if you would like to own a copy of the music that Liz will be receiving, you can check out 33Miles CD's on their website by clicking here.  AND, you can click here to check out our church's CD's "God Hears" and "Believe".  Liz will be getting a copy of "One Life", from 33Miles and a copy of "Believe, with Jason Breland and the North Mobile Worship Choir"!  YAY LIZ!

And, a HUGE HUGE thank you to everyone else who left some very encouraging and very sweet comments for my sweet guest author, Joy.  Joy, thank you SO MUCH for blessing us with an encouraging and very inspiring word (for the girls and the guys!).  You are a special lady and as one of our readers said before, it gives all of us insight on how we can specifically pray for you as Chris travels.  And Joy....WE MISS YOU HERE AT HOME!  But, we all know the calling that has been placed on you and on Chris and I'm so happy to see what God is doing for both of you for being faithful to His calling!

Well, are you ready for more?  I hope that you are.....because next week, we have another special lady who will be sharing a word with us on Christian adoption.  I will tell you, due to an open relationship with her child's birthmom, we are going to let her post with a little bit of some anonymity.  God knows the details and that's all that matters!  I hope that you will come back and join us for a special time with this sweet friend as she shares her heart and the experiences of her (and her husband's)  journey down the road of adoption.  And guess what?  I know that when this special series started, I guess I had set a time limit of the month of August.  Well, I believe that the Lord still has more that He wants to share with everyone because a door opened up for another friend to do a very special post for us.  So that means that we will spill over into the month of September!  And trust me, YOU CANNOT AFFORD to miss his post!  Yes, I said "his" post.  I will give you a formal introduction later, but for now, I will tell you that he and his wife are friends of ours and I PROMISE that you will be blessed by the word that he has for you!

I pray that the Lord will continue to richly bless all of you!  Thank you again for joining in this special series!

Married to a Musician on the Road

I am SO thrilled to have you here today for Bee My Guest!  We have a super sweet special guest with us today, Joy Lockwood.  Joy is an incredibly gifted vocalist, as is her sweet husband, Chris.  It just so happens that Joy has become the stay at home mom to Ella and help meet to Chris as he travels with 33Miles.  But--that's what she's going to tell you about now!  Grab some coffee, prop your feet up and be ready to be blessed, blessed, blessed!  DON'T FORGET TO LEAVE A COMMENT FOR JOY!  YOU WILL BE ENTERED INTO A RANDOM DRAWING TO WIN "ONE LIFE" BY 33MILES AND "BELIEVE", BY JASON BRELAND AND THE NORTH MOBILE WORSHIP CHOIR!  THE WINNER WILL BE ANNOUNCED TOMORROW!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

MARRIED TO A MUSICIAN ON THE ROAD

In December of 2005, Chris and I drove up to Nashville to meet with Jason Barton and the beginning of 33 Miles was ignited.  I use the word "ignited" because after that meeting, things started to move pretty fast.  We had no intentions of Chris being a Christian music artist.  Our options were more about serving on staff at a church or graduate school.  Although music has always been Chris's passion and career path, I just don't think either one of us expected him to be called to the world of the Christian music industry.  I use the word called because for us, it had to be a "calling".  Chris traveled on the road once before with another Christian music group, Truth, and so we knew what it meant for him to be "on the road".  We spent several months praying about whether or not this would be the path God had for us.  It was definitely a "calling" not just for Chris, but for the both of us.  

As Chris's "helpmate", my part of the call is more about the home-front, more about being supportive...more about trusting God.  If I'm not fully trusting God for His provision in the moments that I begin to think that my life is lacking something simply because my husband isn't at home, then I'm missing out on the blessings that come with leaning on the Father.  We are designed to help and support each other, yet there is only one that will never fail to meet our needs and to support us.  We have to look to God first before we can fulfill our roles as husband and wife.

Too often, I find that we depend on our husbands or other people to meet our needs and fulfill our expectations.  That only leads to disappointment and bitterness.  We have to rise to the occasion of seeking God first (then all these things will be added, Matthew 6:33).  For me, sometimes, it's a need of feeling like I'm not alone in this.  Other times it's an emotional need.  Sometimes it's the need for peace on a restless night as I'm praying that Chris is safe as they are driving through the night; or peace in knowing that even though there's a raging storm outside, that God is our ultimate protector.  Often it's the need for strength to get through the day with a toddler and never getting the relief from a husband coming home that evening to at least entertain the kid for five minutes!  But in those moments I continually discover that God is my provider - He is my strength!

One thing that is particularly important to me is that the guys in 33 Miles are all committed to their families and most importantly to God.  They are the real deal.  They all have a vibrant relationship with the Lord, and they all hold each other accountable.  That means a lot to me because I appreciate the fact that Chris is on the road with committed Christians.  It's important that they have boundaries and that they are trustworthy.  I don't know if I could handle the thought of Chris being on the road without the peace of knowing that, amidst a tempting world, he is completely and totally committed first to God and thus, to us.  His devotion to the Lord is my ticket in knowing that I can trust him with our marriage.  Praise God for a godly husband!!!

The challenges of being the wife of a guy that is on the road have been magnified for me lately because we moved to Nashville leaving family and friends that have been a huge support and diversion.  The weekends and the evenings are always the loneliest.  Everyone else is doing things with their families so it's easy to feel somewhat estranged from the rest of the world because our lifestyle is different.  I probably struggle even more because this lifestyle can be an emotional roller coaster.  Almost every week is different.  There's not really a consistent schedule of when Chris is home and on the road, so when Chris is home, it's the highest point of "Yay!  Daddy is home!", and then when he is gone, it's a downer.  I'm often envious of the consistency of other families of knowing that Daddy is home every night and home on the weekends (the way it always was in my home growing up).  Sometimes there is the perk of Chris being home for an entire week...only to have him gone all the next week.  I'm not a "fly-by-the-seat-of-my-pants" personality, so I long for a consistent schedule.  However, God reminds me that happiness and order are not found in a schedule or in knowing what to expect...  happiness and order are found in Him, even when things feel completely OUT of order and unsettled.  

It all comes back to trusting in God and relying on Him for our joy and our peace.  Throughout the past few years, friends have said in a well-meaning manner, "I wouldn't want to do it"...or "I wouldn't let him do it" referring to their husbands being gone all of the time, but the difference is that this is God's will for us.  I have found that when God calls you to something He provides in every way that is needed...He also blesses us beyond our needs.  Sure, I wish Chris came home every evening and that we could have dinner as a family every night.   I have also found that whatever pleasures you think you're missing out on because you have been deprived of something you want, that you can trust that God is able to make it up to you.  He is able to be your help, your company, and your strength.  It doesn't matter what kind of lifestyle you have or what your situation is - there are ALWAYS pro's and con's.  Always.  There are always things that you wish could be different.  It's our fleshly nature to think the grass is greener on the other side.  I challenge you to let your delight be in the Lord regardless of your circumstance.  Whether your husband is home every night (or you wish he wasn't sometimes, lol!), or whether your husband travels a lot, or whether you are a single parent with nobody coming home to help at all - may we all be able to say with Paul, "I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances.  I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty.  I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.  I can do everything through Him who gives me strength. (Philippians 4:11-13)."

Blessings in Christ,

Joy Lockwood

You can keep up with Joy and Chris and their family adventures at chrockwood.blogspot.com. 

To learn more about 33 Miles and to preview their music, please visit 33milesonline.com.

Today's Bee My Guest Article Submitted, Courtesy of Joy Lockwood.

Don't forget tomorrow!

Are you ready for a BIG BLESSING and a BIG GIVEAWAY tomorrow?  Join us right here tomorrow for "Bee My Guest!   You will be blessed!

"Bee" With Me In Week 3! (and a 33Miles giveaway!)

Week Three! It's here!  Bee My Guest has another great post coming to your inbox! Up until now, it's YOU--all of you readers that have made this possible!

My sweet friend, Joy Lockwood, will be joining us this week....and gracious, are you IN FOR A TREAT!  Joy will be sharing her heart this week about her special position in her home of wife and mother. But, she's not just any wife and mom. You see, Joy and her husband both have a VERY unique calling from the Lord on their lives.  Since Chris is a traveling musician with the newest Christian band on the scene, 33Miles, Joy has the special task of being at home somewhat  "solo" sometimes while Chris is on the road.  To some, they may say "that's not fair"!  But to Joy....she approaches the task with a God given calling and a very sweet attitude that could only come from her walk with the Lord.  I can't wait for you to read her post and hear her very special perspective!  We all know how much work marriage is on a daily basis.  And, even being a Christian, it's still full of it's daily challenges and struggles.  Struggles and challenges aside, Chris and Joy approach their circumstances with the grace that only their Lord can provide to them.  Folks, this couple is SOLD OUT TO CHRIST!  Did you hear me?  I mean--SOLD OUT! Chris is sold out to ministry for the Lord and Joy is too as the sweet help meet of her precious mate. They are both called and they are both being obedient to the Lord's calling.  

I hope that you will come back on Tuesday to hear from Joy.  I can promise you that you will be blessed.  And, THERE WILL BE A GIVEAWAY TOO!  What Bee My Guest post would be complete without a giveaway?  So, by leaving an encouraging comment for Joy on Tuesday, you will be entered into a random drawing to receive 2 great CD's!  NOT 1 BUT 2!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  The random person chosen will receive a copy of 33Miles CD, "One Life" and also a copy of "Believe", with Jason Breland and the North Mobile Worship Choir!  You don't want to miss this! 

Week 2 Winner!!!! (Bee My Guest)

As we say here in the Deep South, "Hey Y'All"!  I am SO appreciative of ALL of you who stopped by "Bee My Guest" this week and left an encouraging comment for Heather.  I would also like to thank my sweet friend, Heather, for taking time out of her schedule to write a post for this series.  Heather is a wonderful girlfriend, a wonderful mother and a wonderful wife.  I am SO thankful that God is using her life in such incredible ways in ministering to others!

So, without further delay, I am pleased to announce that Shannon Locklear is our week two winner for this inaugural series of "Bee My Guest" posts!   Congratulations Shannon!!  A copy of the CD "God Hears", as well as a copy of the CD "Wonder" will be going out to Shannon.  If you would like to purchase a copy of "God Hears", please click on the picture of the album cover above.  Also, if you would like to purchase a copy of Heather's CD, "Wonder", please email me at [email protected] and I will relay the requests to Heather.  

Well, there is still MORE to come with Bee My Guest!  Please make sure and come back next Tuesday for sure!  Another special guest and friend will be joining us to share her heart.  Mark your calendars and come back to read a guest post from Joy Lockwood.  Joy is a homemaker, a mommy and wife to full time musician, Chris Lockwood of the fabulous new Chrisitan band, 33Miles.  Next week, we will be giving away a copy of 33Miles new CD, as well as a copy of another of our church's CD's called "Believe"!

So...there is still a lot more to come!  I hope that you will continue to visit and I especially hope to see you next Tuesday for Bee My Guest!

Bee My Guest----One more day! (Giveaway Extended!!!!)

Dear faithful readers, 

For some reason, the graphics on my blog threw off the blog design at some point. So, this caused some people not to be able to appropriately view the article that Heather posted. I'm not sure when it started happening, but I know that some did get the opportunity to see the blog. For those that did not, I'm leaving the giveaway open for another day so that everyone will have the chance to see it. If for any reason you cannot view the blog in three columns, please email me at [email protected] and let me know. I will send you a copy of the article and give you a chance to email me a comment. I believe that the culprit is some of the graphic buttons, so there are some that I have had to remove, just so that the blog will "hopefully" appear correctly today. I will check on the status of everything tonight. I hope that this post works, since I'm doing this from my Blackberry! Hope you are having a good day!

The Blessing of the Blow

Thank you so much for coming today!  I am so happy to have you here today, and I'm sure that Heather is too.  Speaking of Heather, I would like to introduce you to Heather (Fath) Messick .  Heather and I have known each other for many years (I won't count them....it makes me feel old!) since meeting in choir at Mobile College, which is now University of Mobile.  As long as I've known her, Heather's heart has been one for praising the Lord Jesus Christ.  Little did we know all those years ago as college students that one day, Heather's heart for true praise would be put to the test.  Well, dear readers, as you are about to see, Heather has given God all the glory....but I'll let her tell you the story.  So, with that, please grab your coffee (and probably some kleenex) and sit down and join us for Heather's guest post today at Bee My Guest.  And don't forget to leave an encouraging comment for Heather!  All of those commenting will be entered into a random drawing to receive a copy of Heather's CD, "Wonder" and ALSO a copy of our church's newest CD, "God Hears"!  I will announce the winner tomorrow, so make sure and come back to check!  Get ready to be blessed!

The Blessing of the Blow

Have you ever felt that you were dealt a serious blow in life?  Something you didn't think you could recover from?  That is exactly what I was facing on Monday, September 17^th, 2007.  At the eleventh week of my pregnancy, I had visited my OBGYN for the first ultrasound of my third baby.  I was so excited to see the first pictures of this new little creation that God had given Mark and me!  After my ultrasound, my doctor informed me that something was wrong with my baby.  She listed off several genetic disorders that my baby could have, Down syndrome being among them.  Never in a million years did I expect to hear this sort of news.  This was a devastating blow and I didn’t know how I would deal with it. 

Over the course of my pregnancy, I had many ultrasounds by an obstetric specialist.  More and more I heard the words Down syndrome.  And, if that wasn’t enough, Mark and I were told that our baby girl had several major heart defects that would require open-heart surgery shortly after she was born.  I had such difficulty processing all of the information that was being thrown at me.  I could only cling to one thing during such a difficult time in my life.  I clung to the Savior of my heart, the Lord Jesus Christ. 

A passage that came to have new meaning for me was Psalm 139:13-17.  It says, “For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb.  I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.  My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place.  When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, your eyes saw my unformed body.  All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.  How precious are your thoughts toward me, O God!  How vast is the sum of them!”  While I was being told by so many doctors that my baby was not forming “correctly,” I had to believe that God had a purpose for her.  I trusted in my heart that God knew her long before I did and that He made no mistake when He formed her in my womb. 

Mark and I felt that God led us to a wonderful name for our little girl.  We gave her the name Victoria Jayne which means “victorious victory.”  We prayed “victory” for Victoria Jayne during my entire pregnancy.

When Victoria Jayne was born on March 10, 2008, she was, indeed, born with Down syndrome and several major heart defects.  Though it was so emotionally difficult to accept that our little girl was “different,” we still loved her and wanted to be the best parents we could be to her. 

It is hard to explain the grieving process you go through when you have a child with special needs.  You realize dreams that you had for your child may not come to pass.  You realize that many things in your life have suddenly changed and there is no going back to what use to be “normal.”  You have a new “norm” to adjust to and it just takes time to get there mentally and emotionally. 

At 7 weeks of age, Victoria required emergency surgery at University of Alabama Hospital in Birmingham, AL.  We were told by the heart surgeon that Victoria's heart repair was very difficult, however, God blessed and she came through the delicate procedure successfully.

 

Through the course of Victoria’s little life, Mark and I have realized one important thing.  We “get” to experience life in a way that most people don’t.  We will be blessed to live our life with a little girl who will, most likely, love unconditionally in a way that we struggle to.  We will be able to see life through a little different slant than most.  You see, what we originally thought to be a serious blow in our lives has turned out to be a huge blessing.  When we questioned God’s hand and plan, He knew that what He was giving us was a true treasure.  We never imagined that one day we would be the parents of a special-needs child, but we are thankful that God gave us our own little piece of Heaven by sending us an angel by the name of Victoria Jayne. 

Jeremiah 29:11 

“For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.”

 

PS - Shortly after Victoria was born, I penned a song about her that, I believe, was God-inspired.  The song is called “She Is God’s Child.”  A great friend, Dave Simpson, compiled some photos into a moving video for me that I use when I have speaking engagements.  This video has already touched many hearts and I pray it warms yours a little today as you watch it!  To begin the video, please click on "She Is God's Child".    

SHE IS GOD'S CHILD

© 2008 Heather Messick

VERSE 1

Her little face is not the same

As yours and mine they say

But God took the time to fashion her

In such a special way

She may not learn just like I do

Or play the way I play

But she was made especially

For me to know one day

CHANNEL

That God is good

And He is kind

She’s always there

Ever on His mind

 

CHORUS

She is God's child

Crafted and made by Him

She is God's child

Her life magnifies Him

She is God's child

Let our praise begin

And thank Him

For she is God's child

VERSE 2

Her life came no surprise to Him

He knew that she'd be here

This span of time was made for her

So there should be no fear

Whatever struggles come her way

The Lord will see her through

He'll hold her hand and guide her steps

He’s faithful and He’s true

CHANNEL

'Cause He is good

And He is kind

She’s always there

Ever on His mind

CHORUS

 

BRIDGE

Who’s to say her little life

Wasn’t meant to be this way?

To show the world the Savior’s hand

His miracles displayed

 

CHORUS 2X

Bee My Guest article courtesy of Heather Messick

Bee Aware!

Can you believe it?  It's almost here again!  Another great installment of "Bee My Guest" will be back on Tuesday...and you are in for a real blessing.  My dear friend, Heather (Fath) Messick  will be sharing her heart with us specifically regarding the birth of her youngest daughter, Victoria, who was born with Down's Syndrome and a heart defect.  You do not want to miss out on this!  And, as with the last post, there will be a great giveaway!  As always, to be eligible for the giveaway, all you have to do is leave an encouraging comment for my guest author--and that's it!  Then just sit back and be blessed!  Once the comments are in, I will enter all of them into a random drawing.  This week, we will be giving away a copy of Heather's CD, "Wonder".  As a BONUS, I will also be giving away a copy of our church's  newest CD that was released July 7th called "God Hears" (Jason Breland and the North Mobile Worship Choir).  If you love praise and worship music, then you DON'T WANT TO MISS this giveaway!  So, please come back and visit with us on Tuesday (August 11th).  You will be most blessed, I'm sure!   For now, here is a picture of our lovely guest, Heather and her dear little Victoria Jayne.  I am praying that we'll have another great crowd as we welcome Heather to "Bee My Guest"!

And mark your calendars for Tuesday, August 18th when we will welcome the very precious Joy Lockwood, wife to Chris of 33Miles and Mommy to sweet little Ella.  Joy will be giving us a peek into the life of a wife and mother who has a husband on the road.  Then on August 25th (my Mom's birthday!), we will be  welcoming another very special guest who will be talking to us about the joys (and challenges) of adoption.  Folks...there are some GREAT things coming your way!  I hope that you will mark your calendars for these very special ladies who have taken time out of their busy schedules to bless us and encourage us.  

I hope everyone is enjoying their weekend!  See you soon!

And the Winner Is.................

Post edited at 2:35 PM--original posting had accidentally been saved as a private scrapblog post.  I have corrected the scrapblog all of you faithful readers could at least see what in the world got posted!  Thanks for letting me know April!  That's a true friend for you...kind of like that whole "do I have spinach in my teeth?" thing!  She's "had my back" for a "lotta" years!

Rattling the Cage

Welcome everyone!  I'm SO excited that the day is finally here!  Today is the first installment of a month long series called "Bee My Guest".  Each Tuesday in August, there will be a different guest author here at A Pair of Bartletts, the first of which is a dear friend and sister in Christ.  You may know her as Elizabeth White, the extremely talented Christian romance novelist.  I am privileged to know her as "Beth".  Beth is an awesome lady with the heart of a scribe, devoted to the Lord's work.  She has the sweetest countenance of anyone that you'd ever want to meet.  Most of all, she LOVES her Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ with all of her might!  She is a devoted wife and mother and frequently graces us with her flute and penny whistle skills in our church orchestra.  I am not only honored to have her here today, but also thrilled to be giving away a copy of her newest book, "Tour de Force" to one of you!  All you have to do for participation in the giveaway is leave an encouraging comment for Beth after this post.  I will choose a winner in a random drawing and will notify you on Wednesday of the winner. 

Without any further delay....dear readers, I give you Beth White!

 

We shatter devices, exit the stage,

We stop masquerading to the rattle the cage,

We face every searchlight at places we hide,

We dress up for Eden, the gates open wide.

--From “Heaven” by Jars of Clay, from the album The Long Fall Back to Earth

I used to be a person who believed in flying under the radar. For one thing, I didn’t imagine I had an original thought worth sharing with anyone else. I found it comforting to avoid the spotlight while other people took risks and crashed and burned. Besides that, I came to adulthood in the fabulous 70’s, a time when “live and let live” became the American cultural mantra (or “Live and Let Die” if you were James Bond). My generation was brainwashed by film, television, and the publishing industry to believe that no one philosophy or world view contains more or less truth than another. Even as a practicing Christian I had a squirmy conviction that I didn’t have the right to impose my deeply felt faith on anyone else.

Then, somehow, I became a writer.

Oh, well, I’ve always been a writer. I’ve always had a knack for shuffling words around, I spell well, and—thanks to a long succession of militant English teachers—I understand grammar. Those are the tools in my toolbox. The art came later.

My journey to publication was a fairly normal and boring one. I have always enjoyed reading romance—and I mean that in the classic, not the bodice ripper sense—so I naturally gravitated to writing those kinds of stories. I had the usual arrogant idea that nobody was writing romance with a Christian worldview like I wanted to write it, so I planned to step in and fill the gap. And that’s when I discovered a previously unmined store of bulldog, teeth-gritted determination to learn whatever it took to write a publishable novel. Eventually I did.

What did it take? A college fiction-writing class. Membership in a national romance writers’ organization and its local chapter. Participating in a critique group. Studying a shelf full of books on how to write a publishable novel. Giving up weekends and naptimes to write (practice). Being in the right place at the right time.

I interrupt myself at this point to recommend applying the above process to whatever your dream is. A lot of people think that just because they want something badly enough, God will give it to them. I don’t think so. Natural talent will only get you so far. And often we grow and mature in the process of apprenticeship. Most writers simply don’t have anything useful to say until experience has honed the natural talent. And sometimes, for his own undisclosed reasons, God says “no” to the dream.

Anyway, for a long time I was just happy to be along for the ride. God said “yes” to me, connected me to three first-class publishers and a powerful Christian literary agency, and granted friendships with some of the most gifted Christian authors alive. (I treasure those things, though I can’t take any credit for them—it’s simply where God has placed me in the body.) And I walked around feeling alternately unworthy and bruised. Praise is a dangerous thing for the pride; on the flip side, having your words in print makes you vulnerable to harsh criticism.

So when my last contract with Zondervan was fulfilled and God moved me back into teaching music fulltime, I was almost relieved. I didn’t write for eight months or so, at least nothing original. I read and took notes for a historical idea, edited my pastor’s blog, and answered interview questions about the two current releases, Tour de Force and Crescent City Courtship. I couldn’t get a peace about what God wanted me to write next.

Because, you see, by now I’m convinced that words have power. The more I think about the influence of books, film and television on our culture, the more frightened I get about the direction America is going. Have you seriously sat down and thought about how much of your thought process is shaped by what you see on a movie or TV screen, or read on a page or computer screen? As a teacher and pastor’s wife, as a mom and aunt and mentor of young women—heck, as a tiny speck on the Facebook scope—it has become increasingly clear to me that we are in for one big rude wake-up call. Millions of American women are confused, worried, blind to the possibility of hope, the reality of God’s unconditional love, the sure coming of his judgment on our selfishness.

Now, am I delusional enough to think I can do anything about that by writing Christian romance novels that might, max, get into the hands of 10,000 other Christian women? Well, yeah, I guess I am. Because for whatever reason, forums like this keep opening up. Opportunities for me to say: HELLO! My name is Beth White. God has a purpose for your life, just like he’s got a purpose for me. The Bible says so. Creation says so. The proven resurrection of Jesus Christ says so.

I’m tired of downpedaling the demands of faith. I’m sick of standing by and watching my sisters settle for weak, sit-on-your-fanny-in-a-Bible-study Christianity lite. I’m not sure how this is going to play into what I write, or if I’ll ever even sign another publishing contract.

I’m so very far away from where I want to be. But I tell you this—I’m not going back. I challenge anyone who’s reading this to jump off the spiritual cliff with me. What do you have to lose except yourself and your fear? And is that really worth hanging onto?

This "Bee My Guest" article is courtesy of Elizabeth White. 

What's all the BUZZ??? Great Christian fiction AND 33Miles!

I am So incredibly excited that we've almost made it to the first "Bee My Guest" post!  Next week on Tuesday, August 4th, the inaugural post of "Bee My Guest" will be led by a sweet friend, fabulous Christian fiction writer and most importantly a dear Sister in Christ, Elizabeth "Beth" White. And if that were not enough, there will be a GIVEAWAY too!  I will be giving away an autographed copy of Beth's newest book, "Tour de Force"!! 

 All you have to do to qualify is leave an encouraging and uplifting comment for my guest authors...that's IT!  It's that simple!  Once you have left your comment, I'll  be choosing a random winner and will announce the winner the next day. 

And....if that hasn't whetted your blog post appetite enough, there's more!  More you say?  YES MORE!

On Tuesday, August 11th, another dear friend, and another faithful Sister in Christ, Joy Lockwood, will be guest posting on "Bee My Guest".  Now, you may know Joy's husband, Chris, but I'll get to him in a minute.  For now, let me tell you a little about Joy.  If you have ever wondered what the voice of an angel sounded like, then Joy would be your girl.  Her voice is an incredible gift from the Lord and one that she has used to minister to so many people.  She has a heart for ministering to others and has a great word to share with you in her post.  You DON'T want to miss out.  In the meantime, back to her hubby, Chris.  You may know Chris from one of the BEST Christian groups on the Christian music scene, 33Miles .  Chris Lockwood is Joy's faithful companion and both are parents to a beautiful little girl, Ella.  If you haven't listened to 33Miles yet--WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN WAITING ON?  If you would like to hear them for FREE, then go to the link below and download "Jesus Calling" FOR FREE!  This MP3 will be available to you through this link until August 11th, so GO NOW!

But, make sure and come back to read Joy's post, because I will be giving away a copy of their new CD, "One Life". 

ALSO---since Joy is opening up her heart to us in her post, I am also going to give away a copy of one of our church's CD's "Believe", with Jason Breland and North Mobile Worship Choir (from First Baptist North Mobile), on which, you will hear Joy singing "I Will Rejoice" (Surprise Joy!  You didn't know about that part!  Sneaky huh?).  I will give the winner the option of receiving these two albums by CD or you can pick up your prize instantly if you want both of them sent to you in iTunes.  How cool is that?  You have a choice!

Well, I hope that this has geared you up for the great things that are coming to A Pair of Bartletts!  And this is not all folks....I'll be filling you in on the other posts coming after these...so stay tuned!

 

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